Don’t be stupid!
That’s what I used to tell myself. Don’t make a stupid mistake. I was deathly afraid of making mistakes. This fear paralyzed me. It has always prevented me from following my heart and making decisions. I could never understand how others seemed fearless.
Fear can come from a lot of places but most often our fears are influenced by our finances. We talk about a decision being too risky. But in these cases, isn’t ‘risky’ is just the fear of losing money, camouflaged in a different package. By being vague about the source of risk, we don’t need to confront the fact that money is controlling our lives. We think we have a balanced set of values. Friends. Happiness. Freedom. Yet, for most, money always seems to prevail as the prime motivator or demotivator.
But, isn’t it riskier to go on living knowing that you’re not doing what you want to do? Isn’t it riskier to just check off days on the calendar? Like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, living the same day over and over and over again.
We delude ourselves into thinking that there’s another go around. That we’ll have another shot at this. In the end, we become victims of a system meant to keep us working, but not thriving. Very few people make enough money to have true freedom. Most of us are just getting by.
Isn’t it frustrating when you realize that you’re not where you (think you) want to be, and don’t know what to do next? You feel like every day is a waste because you’re not working on something more fulfilling.
If you’re going to just ‘get by’, wouldn’t you rather just get by doing something you love. Wouldn’t you rather look at your life through a lens that’s not clouded by the fear of being without money? Wouldn’t you want to live a more purpose-driven life?
When Fear Takes Over
Hypothetically, what if you did know your purpose. Your calling. Your gift. Your passion. Whatever it may be. And to pursue it, what would you be willing to risk? What motivation would you need to rebalance your priorities and move forward without fear? Have you even thought about it? Or have you succumbed to the routine of taking each day for granted? I can empathize. I spent the better part of my professional life in a fog. I had this plan that when I turned 40, I would figure it out. Then it was when I turned 45. And so on.
The truth is that we don’t have an unlimited amount of time. We’re all going to die. We all have one kick of the can. But fear is a real bitch.
We all have our reasons for fear, with most of our fears being a result of deep-rooted programming from our childhood. So I get it. It’s not easy. I’m not judging your source of fear. I’m just asking you a few questions that you may have been asking yourself. Or maybe you have been scared to ask them.
“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw
It Will Eat Away At Your Soul
Besides the sheer passing of time, having that lingering feeling that you’re not doing what you truly want can be mentally, and spiritually catabolic. It can eat at you. This isn’t a manageable condition, nor should it be.
Yet, if this is you. If you have the feeling that there’s more to life, you still need to find peace in this moment.
You may find this counterintuitive. At some level it is. But upon further reflection, the answer is simple. You need to accept the present moment, but start planting the seeds to consciously evolve, as these seeds will condition your mind to focus on your purpose. And they are fuelled by putting one foot in front of the other. Moving forward. Consistently. Deliberately. With intention.
Some of us are already enlightened as to what we want in life. The only thing missing is the motivation and courage to change. But for many, it’s not clear. They know something needs to change, but they don’t know where to start. They often don’t even know the direction or destination. Living their purpose is an empty statement, it has no emotional connection…Yet.
Here’s where focus and faith come in. First, you need to ascertain which seeds you need to plant. These seeds are aspects of your life that resonate with who you are at your core, your soul. They could be the people you surround yourself with. The books you read. The conversations you have. Anything that serves you. That makes you feel good. You need to create an environment that will help you to evolve. Eliminate the negative, and invite the positive.
This deliberate recalibration of your environment will enable these seeds to start shifting your subconscious. You’ll find that both your conscious and subconscious minds will help direct you on what to do next. You’ll notice things that were previously invisible to you. You’ll notice conversations that are aligned with your soul. You’ll start to see things that have been there all the time, yet unbeknownst to you.
Think of it as evolving through osmosis. You’re won’t be forcing the issue. This new environment will attract your passion.
Hope and Faith: A Worthy Duo
The second part of the equation is hope and faith. You need to believe that this shift will result in an understanding, then live your purpose. This hope will allow you to accept the present moment, knowing that the seeds will bear fruit and you will get to where you need to be.
But the belief that aligning with who you are at your core will provide all the riches you desire – both monetarily and spiritually – is the hardest part. Our brains are inclined to focus on the negative. This negativity bias works against us if we aren’t moving forward with intention. We need to program ourselves to believe through deliberate action, mantras, and repeated practice. We need to rewire our brain to BELIEVE.
So, it’s time to start believing. And remember, following your passion is like a poker game… you’re not going to win if you’re afraid to lose.