Sex and the City Myths & Lessons: Operation Post It Note – The Breakup

Operation Post-It – Berger Edition

“I’m sorry, I can’t. Don’t Hate Me” – Berger

In this episode Berger dumps Carrie on a post-it note.


I have good news for you, we have improved from the days of the post-it note breakup! I would like to announce that we have officially been upgraded to the ‘text message” or Facebook announcement. Yes, Facebook, I was watching my new fav show Southern Charm…yeah yeah reality tv junk food. Where, Thomas (one of the guys on the show) who is dating Katherine (the mother of his child) dumps her via Facebook announcement. How nice is that! Romantic! Oh wait, it actually gets better, why even bother texting a “we’re through, I am done with you” when you can simply delete your now former significant other from all forms of communication. I am sure they will get the hint, it’s over!

Watching this episode all I could think was: I wonder what Carrie would do if she got dumped via text? Over bbm? Or Facebook? Or Perhaps, the more discrete approach ‘the fade out’ I will read your messages and not respond…do you get that I am done with you? Oh you haven’t? Okay fine, I will now delete you off my Facebook. I tried to get rid of you the easy way, but you see, you made it hard and have done this to yourself; it’s over in every sense of the word. This is not an uncommon practice nowadays. It’s kind of just the way it is. It’s a battlefield out there, so suit up, your heart depends on it.

This got me thinking…What ever happened to breakup etiquette? Have we really become that cold? Was Berger’s post-it note breakup a prelude to what was to come? Not all relationships end well and it’s sometimes best to cut ties quickly rather than prolong the inevitable end. But remember, at one point you thought this person was someone special who deserved respect. Someone you would do anything for. It’s funny how a few months or years can change all those feelings of euphoria you used to feel when you looked at their face. Maybe, they did you wrong. Maybe, it just wasn’t meant to be, but you still owe them and yourself a clean break that’s marked with integrity. They may not understand why it’s over, very few breakups are mutual. They may need you to explain yourself while they plead their case and tell you why this is a bad idea.

It sounds uncomfortable doesn’t it? Well, if you are going to do the deed you need to do it the right way and not disappear like a coward. Obviously, this applies to ladies and gents. Just say what you have to say. You are entitled to your feelings, even if it means you are breaking someone’s heart. In the long run as they look back on life’s lessons they will thank you for being honest and having the courage to tell them how you felt. Always imagine how you would feel and what you would like someone you care about to do.

Take Away: What’s the right way to end a relationship? Should there be breakup etiquette?
1. Phone Call
2. Coffee.
3. The Park

What do you think?

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Hanifa Sekandi

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